Wednesday 13 May 2009

A new Arsenal XI

Seeing as our current Arsenal side is so unfit for purpose I have decided that it would be sensible for Arsene to sell our whole squad and replace it with fresh new exciting talent. This is a great idea, it would involve no risk as all the new players would gel instantly and form a brilliant new title winning side, probably not in their first year, maybe they could win the Championship in their second year though. The following players are players that have all been suggested as Arsenal signings in various areas of the media, all within the last couple of days, so it's not even just my own vacuous gaseous emissions hitting the pages, it's a team from the grass roots if ever there was one, a team from the fans and for the fans:

Robert Green
Glen Johnson Zapata Sakho
Chamakh Scott Parker Alonso Coutadeur
Pogrebnyak Santa Cruz Forlan
Given how easy it would be to assemble this brilliant side I would also advise the board to sack Arsene and replace him with a complicated e-democratic network that would allow a kind of web-based team selection process. It would save money on his wages and most of us fans know way more about football than old Arsene Wenger, he's past it really isn't he.
No, but seriously if it's this easy for me to come up with such an awesome new Arsenal XI then I really don't know what Arsene is going on about when he says it's hard to find players to improve our side. The grass always appears greener, so we should make our team better and greener by signing up some superior talent from the other side. I'm very surprised that Chelsea didn't get the best out of the mighty Glen Johnson and Scott Parker, it may be tricky to fight off Real Madrid for their signatures though.
The silly season is here and there are still two games to go, I think I'm going to go f*cking insane if I have to put up with three more months of this inane dribbling. There is one potential cloud with a silver lining though, Myles Palmer has revealed that if Arshavin leaves Arsenal then he will leave ANR, so when Arshavin does eventually leave Arsenal we had better make sure we hold Myles to his promise. I apologise for this slightly deranged posting, I find the best way of getting through the silly season is to take the michael out of it.


Rhinogooner said...

1979, have you forgotten to take your medication again mate?

Anonymous said...

well that new defence cant be any worse than whats there now ! .stevo dublin gooner.

Anonymous said...

oh bye the way is it me or has anyone else noticed how bad bacary sagna is at crossing a ball into the box lately ? dont get me wrong i love him and all that but is crossing is all over the shop... problem is tough when the ball is a good one theres never anyone near it. stevo dublin gooner.

yakubu J. said...

Well thats is your opinion.BY THE WAY are you at all a GOONER?

1979gooner said...

'taking the michael'

I'm amazed at some people's lack of a sense of irony.

Rhinogooner said...

I detected your cynicism. I was just playing along...

1979gooner said...

I know you did Rhino!

Don't think Yakabu did though.

Obsinho said...

1979 - you're such a hater. I think you're a spud in disguise. Why don't you go an support Utd if you're so desperate for a team to spend money.

Double irony in your face bee-hatch.