Thursday, 5 March 2009

Burnley, Bischoff and buckets of b.s.

Given 1979's prior commitments this week to carry on Dr Shipman's good work on the frail and needy, you get another instalment today of Uncle Ted's rambling nonsense. So shut up in the back row and get your note books out.

My self-serving campaign for positive mental thinking has paid off big time. We beat West Brom on Tuesday and Citeh beat Aston Villa on Wednesday. It has nothing to do with what actually happened in those games, and everything to do with enough Gooners believing in the greatness of Kolo Toure. Did I tell you before how much I love Kolo? Oh yes, I did.

Its like Will Farrell in Elf. If we stop believing in Christmas then it will end. And I would not like to be responsible for killing Santa, or Arsenal for that matter. So stop being so bloody depressed and start looking forward to the Burnley game on Sunday.

News leaking out of the ever-so-reliable Arsenal.con is that Walcott and Eduardo will "certainly be in the squad for Sunday", but apparently its also dependant on "how Eduardo reacts and responds to his injury". So, presumably if Eduardo doesn't respond well, then he might not be in the squad at all. Thanks Arsenal.con. Really useful.

Anyway, so Theo and Eduardo may or may not be back against Burnley. Well that's pretty good news in my book. RVP could do with a rest, so maybe Bendtner will start up top, possibly with some Vela and Arshavin (who is cup-tied against Roma) on the wings, with three in the middle from Ramsey/Song/Denilson/Diaby/Bischoff. Theo and Eduardo to come off the bench in the second half and give the northerners the stuffing they deserve? Sounds like destiny to me.

Have to admit it would not surprise me if Wenger does something completely random like play Bischoff from the start. He does odd stuff like this in the FA Cup. I remember Aliadiere starting in the FA Cup semi-final against ManUre some years ago. He played shite and we got thumped. Hopefully Bischoff's career won't be as blighted as Aliadiere's. But it probably will.

In fact, wasn't Aliadiere hailed as the next Van Basten when he arrived at Arsenal. Tipped as being a better natural finisher at the Clarefontaine academy than Anelka or Trezeguet. What a load of tosh. Sometimes I really think we get a bit overexcited about some of our young players.

And on that bombshell of reality I will leave it. The fact of the matter is that Burnley had a bloody good run in the Carling Cup and play good passing football. They gave our kids something of a lesson. Which is quite impressive given that our kids tend to be the ones who hand out lessons.

But the tide has turned this week. Its not the return of Arsenal's greatness, or even the end of our shiteness. But it might be the start of the end of our shiteness. So lets not go and spoil it all by making a mess of beating Burnley. Please don't start with Bischoff. Please.....


Anonymous said...

the bish will score the winner...

Si said...

Just seen the news that Bischof will captain the team and will start in goal before moving around the pitch, anti-clockwise, playing in each position. At the final wistle he will be eating a big steak and ale pie from mine and Xabi Alonso's pie and mash shop opposite Holloway Rd tube station.
Me and Xabi, we're like that (I'm crossing me fingers there, brilliant).

Obsinho said...

Quality post Si - I'd like to see the Catlan flavourse Xabi would bring. I hear he has a wonderful collection of sherries in his cellar. Next to his sex-swing.

I have no idea what line-up Wenger will go with. Arshavin looks crackered, but will not be involved on Wednesday. Nicky B will be on a high, but we may need to keep him fresh.

Denilson could certainly do with a rest, but Rambo has looked shaky recently. WOuldn't mind seeing Merida get a run out, and maybe a Vela Bendtner up front. As a strike partnership they looked great at the start of the season.

Looking forward to it either way.

Ted said...

I cannot believe that Si has ruined this thread by mentioning Alonso again.

I feel dirty.

1979gooner said...

I don't like the lack of seriousness on the blog today, very upsetting indeed.

I think he'll play a fairly strong side. Like the idea of Vela and Bendtner up top to avenge the defeat to Burnley earlier this year.

Wouldn't mind seeing Gibbs and Djourou getting games, give Denilson a break, start Arshavin as he's cup tied, think we need the man Diaby in for this one though.

ps on an unrelated matter is it just me is or ronaldo the biggest wanker to have ever graced the english game?

Anonymous said...

I LOVE your blog.

Obsinho said...

Ronaldo is an absolute shite-hawk. Massive amounts of respect for his - he is undoubtedly one of the best players in the league.

But you can just see how much he rates himself as superior to everyone (not just as a footballer) in everything he does. Brits don't like cocky people, so it is clear why he polarises opinions, but I do know quite a few Mancs who also find him unpalatable.