Saturday, 14 November 2009

International football is toss

Just a brief post to say the above. International football is frothy warm urine compared to the clear red cabernet sauvignon of the champions league. Bring on the end of the inter-lull.

Tuesday, 10 November 2009

The Unwritten Rules of Penalties

I tread lightly as I am intending to bring up one of everyone's favourite subjects, namely diving, referees and what we do about it.

I only saw the replays of David Ngog's acrobatics against Liverpool and he has been roundly criticised for his disgraceful and theatrical dive that earned the Scousers an ill-deserved point. At least that is what the papers said this morning. By the afternoon, some of the papers' internet sites are carrying articles asking why video technology still hasn't been brought into play. Apparently a video replay will clarify all incidents and the referee will never make a mistake again - see this in the Telegraph.

As usual, I am not so sure its all that simple. So lets start from the top and see where we get.

1. A penalty is given for a foul in the box. So thats pretty easy so far.

2. A player will sometimes commit a foul that does not actually make contact with the opposition player. For example, the use of dangerous play such as a high foot in the tackle, is a foul even if no contact is made. However, its rarely the case that defenders get punished if the incident happens inside the box.

3. Many fouls do involve contact with the opposition player, but are not enough to bring the player down. What is unclear in the majority of those incidents is whether the foul actually affects the player with the ball. For instance, there is an unwritten rule that so long as the striker gets his shot away, then the subsequent leg-breaker from John Terry is not a foul. The same is not true outside the box - it would be a free kick awarded and a card for Terry.

4. Strikers get pissed off that constant fouling from defenders goes unpunished. The unwritten rule is that so long as the defender makes contact with the striker, then the striker is allowed to throw themselves to the ground, turn forlornly to the ref and say "I had no choice, he touched me softly just behind the ear, its a penalty"

5. Outside the box, players regularly and routinely anticipate bad tackles, hurdle the challenge, collapse in a heap and get a free kick from the ref. There are two unwritten rules for this situation. The first one is that if David Beckham can do it, then so can I. The second unwritten rule, is that if a player expects to be fouled, then why wait for contact which might cause injury, when he can miss all contact altogether and still get a free kick?

6. Inside the box, as David Ngog shows, the hurdle and collapse routine is disgraceful cheating. Unless Steven Gerrard does it.

7. Occassionally, depending on the moods of the season, other factors have to be taken into account, such as whether the player was heading towards goal or away from it, whether a goal scoring opportunity had been lost, whether the player had lost control of the ball or not. This unwritten rule is all about not giving a penalty when you don't think the striker deserved one.

Ok, so everyone still with me? There is so much subjectivity in the subtleties of the rules of fouling that its basically impossible for a ref to get in right. Trying to remember that a collapse outside the box is a free kick to the striker, whereas a collapse inside the box is a free kick to the defender is never going to lead to consistent decisions.

You can also show video replays to me and 1979 all day. Although we are both Arsenal fans, I would bet we disagree on most decisions on whether a foul should be given, let alone whether it deserves a penalty. We're as bad as Rednapp and Souness on Sky:

Jamie Rednapp:- "Definite penalty. Stonewall decision for me. Thats a quality ball from Lampard, pure quality. Gallas just touches Drogba with his finger-tips, just there, you can see it on the replay, and the big man goes down and starts twitching like he is a decapitated chicken."

Graeme Sounness:- "Fucking shut it Rednapp, you lame arsed cunt. Drogba should be sent off for being a ponce. Have that it your face pretty boy. And that..."

Apart from calling 1979 a pretty boy, thats pretty much how it is. And given that we are footballing experts that this world has rarely seen the likes of, then what chance has a video ref got? Thats right. None at all.

Maybe we could have Souness and Rednapp miked up and watching a live screen for every game of football in the world at all times - every ref in the country can then press the panic button and it goes through on a random selector either to Graeme "Fuck me in the arse if thats a pen" Souness, or otherwise the striker goes wild as soon as Jamie "Stonewall quality gay penalty" Rednapp points to the spot. It would be at least as effective, and probably more entertaining, than the current lottery.

Sunday, 8 November 2009

Tame Wolves pose little threat

Morning all, and a happy Sunday it seems this morning in trying to evaluate Arsenal's excellent 4-1 win at Molineux yesterday evening. With ManUre traveling to fortress Stamford Bridge this afternoon, we have a position for a few hours where all the teams at the top of the table have played 11 games. And Arsenal's 25 points looks very comfortable alongside ManUre, also on 25, and just behind Chelsea on 27. This Arsenal team is a goal scoring machine, although still a bit leaky at the back on occasion, but with 36 goals from 11 Premiership games, we are scoring for fun at the moment.

This Wolves team should not be underestimated. They are a good and organised side who play decent football and will cause some upsets this year. Their 10 points from 11 games shows they are no whipping boys, and this fixture 12 months ago would probably have been the usual soft Arsenal performance, out-muscled and out-fought, defensively frail and prone to errors.

And make no mistake, Wolves threw everything at us for the first 20 minutes. Gallas diving in horribly against Evans-Blake (I think) miles up the field, leading to a corner to be conceded and a booking for Billy. Arsenal's split zonal and man-marking system was exposed from a well delivered the corner and Wolves almost scored.

The omens were poor, but luck was somewhat on our side, especially in the shape of the hapless Zubar. The big French defender managed to concede an entirely unnecessary free kick against Eduardo, which Vermaelen met and forced a corner, which was then well delivered into the six yard box for Zubar to shin into his own net under pressure from Eduardo.

And from that moment onwards, there only seemed one way the game would go. Because rather than sit back and try and force an equaliser over the remaining 70 minutes of the game, Wolves decided to push forwards and take us on head-to-head. Which is exactly what we wanted, as acres of space opened up in midfield for Fabregas, Arshavin and the impressive Rambo to exploit. However, our second goal was outrageously lucky, as Eduardo's chip back to Rambo was deflected cruelly into the top right hand corner.

However, Arsenal's third goal was a thing of genuine beauty. Fabregas, RVP and Sagna combined down the right in a move built by the composure and accuracy of the passing, plus the willingness of all three players to make intelligent and direct runs. RVP's softening of the ball into Cesc's route to score was something that the great Dennis Bergjamp would be proud of, and a lummox like Adebayor would be incapable of. And it was great to see all three players applaud each other's efforts as they celebrated the goal afterwards.

In contrast, the second half was a bit more drab, as Arsenal added a fourth through Arshavin, the ball coming through a crowd of players from a corner and not being spotted by the keeper. That said, for all our injury problems (and I don't know what the news is on Diaby), it was incredible that Wenger could withdraw Eduardo and Arshavin, both of whom had put in a solid shift, to be replaced by Rosicky and Nasri, both of whom themselves returning to match fitness after injury.

It also speaks volumes of Rambo, who also was solid if not brilliant, that Wenger chose to give the youngster a full 90 mins with that talent on the bench. If Rambo can get another few games under his belt in the next few months, then with Denilson also coming back into contention, there is a feeling that we will have some cover in midfield when Song goes off to the ACN in January. Because make no mistake, along with Vermaelen, Alex Song has been brilliant this season for Arsenal. A real workhorse in midfield, endlessly closing down the opposition and covering back when Gallas needs some help. Song is also excellent in possession, and whilst Cesc is having a stormer again this season, I put a lot of Cesc's success down to the quality of the platform that Song is giving him.

At the moment, Arsenal are making football look a simple game. We are simply better in every department that the opposition. The fact that we utterly dominated Spurs last weekend in a game that should have resulted in a bigger scoreline that 3-0 is extremely encouraging, since it suggests that we are not simply flat track bullies.

If we dispatch Sunderland on the 21 November, which will not be an easy game, then we get our next shot at one of the big boys when Chelsea come to the Emirates on 29 November. And say it quietly, but I think we now have the tools to give the Chelsea grandads a beating.

Friday, 6 November 2009

Mancs don't dive

This was a blatant dive. The clip above makes it look like a dive and it is the most forgiving angle. From the side one can clearly see Fletcher throwing himself down before any contact is made and the contact that is made is microscopic to say the least. The ref got it spot on and booked Fletcher for his gamesmanship.

The media reaction has been an utter shambles. Both Andy Gray on Sky and the ITV commentator are bigots living in denial as they both called it a cast iron penalty, refusing to even acknowledge that there might have been a bit of gamesmanship at work.

Alex Ferguson has gone ballistic as always, refusing to even consider that one of his honest players would ever con a referee, remember that this is the man who let Ronaldo get away with the worst cheating of any player around for year upon year:

"I can't believe it. I watched the camera by the side of the dugout and it is the worst I have ever seen in my lifetime – unbelievable."

It was one of the worst dives you've ever seen 'Sir'(*). Just remember what Sir Alex said about the Eduardo situation, as if we needed to know what he thought:

"It was a high-profile game and something has to be done, it creates an incredible reaction from the media and public in these instances. Something should be done and we hope the message gets across."

Either Ferguson is a moron in denial or his is cunningly trying to detract attention from the dive by pretending it wasn't one, either way he's a clear hypocrite. Strange how it's fine for Fergie to have his say when one of our players exaggerates a challenge, but if Arsene had his say on Fletcher I bet he wouldn't be too happy. The media's refusal to even acknowledge that certain players from certain special clubs ever dive is frankly pathetic and reveals their complete lack of objectivity. The media's partisan coverage of Arsene's and 'Sir'(*) Alex's respective behaviour also gives their game away, one is labelled a whinging moaner whatever he says while the other is routinely given a free ride to justify the unjustifiable.

(*)-denotes the fact that the title 'Sir' means nothing more than Alex Ferguson being rewarded by the Labour party for backing them both financially and non-financially, it has been purchased with money just as if you or I went to the supermarket to buy an apple, it most certainly does not signify that he is a man of good repute or of good honour.

Thursday, 5 November 2009

Rampaging russian catalyses dutch demolition

It is easy to take for granted, after all it is now almost ten seasons in a row of qualification for the knock out phase of the Champions League, what a fantastic record, it's just the cherry on top that Arsene is after now. No one really expected Alkmaar to pose much of a threat and this proved to be the case.

Clichy was out with what I suspect is a stress fracture of a pars interarticularis in his spine, it is common for this to be present on both sides of the vertebra and this is the case for Gael as his previous stress fracture was on the other side at the same level. Sagna was rested, Manuel remained in goal, while Samir Nasri started his first game following his return from injury as part of the front three.

The football was slick and cut Alkmaar to ribbons, Andrei Arshavin seemed to be at the heart of everything, the movement and pace was simply too much for the dutch champions to cope with. The first goal from Cesc saw some pretty dodgy keeping but it was still a fairly decent effort from the skipper. The second goal was Nasri at his best, recieving the ball and turning neatly in one movement, he created space for himself and buried the finish low into the bottom corner, top class stuff. The slick passing and interplay for the third and fourth was awesome, two lovely finishes as well from Cesc and Diaby. Manuel was done by an excellent bit of trickery with the eyes for the Alkmaar goal, predicting the centre Manuel was completely undone as the ball was fired past him at his near post.

Overall job done again, it would be nice to tie things up with a win against Liege in the next game. It is heartening to see the team clicking together so nicely, we are defending far better than we have for a while, Vermaelen is not only an excellent aggressive defender but he is also a great leader on the pitch. Gibbs now has a great chance to cement himself into the starting eleven. The young midfield are growing together, Song is looking a force to be reckoned with, Cesc has been finding top form again over the last month, while the unfairly maligned Diaby does appear to be improving and improving his decision making, Up front the abundance of talent is frankly incredible, last night we had Bendtner, Walcott and Vela not even involved for various reasons, but we still had so many options to choose from. If we can keep things going through the grim winter months I will seriously fancy our chances come May.

Monday, 2 November 2009

Amusement from some idiots

Terry Venables was always an extremely overrated manager, and it appears that he is about as gifted as Harry Redknapp at being an oracle of the future. I chanced upon his Sun column from the weekend, in retrospect it makes absolutely brilliant reading but not for the reason that he intended:
"Watch you back Arsene! Arsene Wenger today comes face to face with the man who provides possibly the biggest threat to his glittering 13-year career as Arsenal boss... Harry Redknapp. "

What a comedy opening line, I really think Arsene would have been quaking in his boots, if Harry Redknapp is his biggest threat I genuinely think that Arsene's corpse will be able to manage Arsenal adequately when Arsene dies of old age in approximately 2045. Read the rest of Venables' comedy piece for your own amusement, it really is side splitting at times. The Sun really does bring its readers some absolute chestnuts of wisdom, the greatest footballing brains such as Redknapp and Venables are never too far from a cracking column, you are more likely to find a pearl of wisdom fishing in a public toilet.

Speaking of idiots, one well know Arsenal commentator felt the need to big up Craig Eastmond to such an extent that he claimed he was already better than Song, Eboue and Denilson. I've nothing against Craig Eastmond but the lad is only 18 and we should be careful before hyping him up too much, we should also be careful about slagging off our own players who are already looking absolutely top notch such as Alex Song. There was a veiled accusation of racism against Arsene that I found unpleasant as well as out of order:
"Will this 18-year old from Wandsworth be given the same opportunities as a Frenchman or an African? Will Wenger support Eastmond and give him a real chance to make a career at Arsenal? Or will he loan him out and flog him off to QPR or Birmingham?"

I wonder if this author would name any single ex-Arsenal player that has gone on to greater things having left the club, has a single one of these players looked like someone who would have been an asset to our first team? Exactly, there is no evidence to back up this lazy and stupid argument. I will not link up to who wrote this story as he deserves no further coverage of his shoddy work, is is enough to say that the man is a music writer by trade and understands football about as well as Jamie Redknapp. This author is scum of the lowest form, he sensationalises merely to attract readers as he knows that without it no one will read his average run of the mill dross.

Finally you've just got to love this quote from RVP after the spuds humiliation, absolutely priceless words that need to further comment:
"It always feels good to beat Spurs. It even feels good when we don't play them and they get beaten, so it's especially good when we've played them."

Sunday, 1 November 2009

Partisan media and Redknapp out of his depth

It is strange that Arsenal Champions League matches always play second fiddle to those of Chelsea/Manu/Liverpool when it comes to getting on tv, especially given how few supporters Chelsea have. It is strange how rarely an Arsenal game is featured early on in Match of the Day, invariably tedious games involving Manu/Chelsea and Liverpool feature earlier on. It is strange how Sky's advertising campaign earlier in the season involved Manu, Liverpool, Chelsea and Man City, they assumed Arsenal would not be part of the top four. This is all rather strange and cannot be explained solely by chance.

The media reaction to Eduardo being toppled against Celtic was also rather strange. He was public enemy no 1, he was written off as a cheat despite an unblemished career record, the tag lives on despite him actually being a rather honest player. In recent weeks we have seen numerous blatant acts of cheating routinely ignored by the media, something strange is afoot. Arsene has hit the nail on the head with comments in the screws:


"Last week, Scott Parker dived. No one spoke about it. You start to think the media make the rules. If they made a big thing of Eduardo then why did they not do that against Parker?"

Why indeed? The silence following Parker's blatant dive was deafening, the lack of comment regarding Cole's compliance with gravity was also notable. Yesterday Didier Drogba was back to his best, he was put clean through against Bolton, Jay Lloyd Samuel pursued him, Drogba took too heavy a touch and the chance appeared to have gone, Samuel made a slight attempt at a tackle, Drogba slowed himself down and took the most minimal of contact, he then went down as if shot, writhing around in fake agony as only he knows how, the game was changed, a penalty to Chelsea and Bolton down to ten men. Drogba's cheating has again been rewarded. The media have been silent on this, so what hope is there that cheating will be stamped out when it is so routinely ignored by the media?

Harry Redknapp has again revealed himself to be the most sore of losers. Redknapp tried to put down the defeat to just suicidal defending, he failed to admit that his inferior side were comprehensively outplayed for the duration. He even tried to claim that the spuds controlled the game in the first half, it's a bit strange to control a game without creating any chances while seeing the opposition have more possession and chances. He gave no credit to RVP for his excellent finish for the first goal, Redknapp tried to put this goal down to the third person as if the ball 'had squirmed in somehow'. In fact our excellent striker was too quick for your crocked centre back and he managed to control the ball into the bottom corner, that is not 'squirmed in somehow'. Redknapp pretended the spuds were comfortable until the 42nd minute, in fact it was more of a case of the spuds riding their luck, only one team looked like scoring. The fact that at 2-0 down they never looked as if they had the ability or belief to get back into the game was also ignored by Redknapp.

To put Cesc's goal to just bad defending is bizarre as well as disgraceful, it was a majestic piece of play, not many players could do what Cesc did yesterday, the fact that we have players who can do this is what makes us a class or ten above the spuds, something Redknapp would do well to acknowledge rather than pretending it was a self inflicted defeat. It is strange that the media give this average manager such a free run to say what he chooses, it is strange that he is never labelled a sore loser when he is always so very ungracious in defeat.

This is all very strange. At least at the end of the interview Redknapp effectively admitted that he expects to lose at Arsenal, he denied the result was a 'blip', to me this is an inadvertent admission that he didn't hold out much hope of a victory at the Emirates. At least bitter 'Arry got one thing right, it was indeed 'sunday morning football' and this came from his sunday morning players that have been assembled at double the cost of Arsene's squad, well done 'Arry, what a lovely cheeky chap you are.